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5 Common Public Speaking Mistakes (and how to fix them)

7 minutes ago
6 min read

We all have to do it. Some of us have to do it EVERY DAY and yet so few of us ever receive any formal Public Speaking Training. Unsurprising then, that most of us fall into habits that make it even more challenging. But with a little bit of practice, all of the common 'mistakes' can be corrected. And once you've done that you'll find not only is speaking in front of other people easier, you'll have more focus and the task itself should feel a lot less scary.



Man Breathing
Man Breathing
  1. BREATHING INCORRECTLY

You know that horrible closed feeling in the throat and chest? The one we often associate with having to give a speech? Yep. That's thoracic breathing or 'shallow breathing' and it's actually a fight-or-flight response. When you feel stressed your brain releases stress hormones like adrenaline. These hormones can cause the muscles in your chest wall and shoulders to tighten up in preparation for an imagined threat and because your upper body muscles contract, your rib cage cannot expand fully, forcing you to take rapid, short breaths using your chest instead of your diaphragm. So that hoarse, cracking voice that comes out? A direct result of incorrect breathing.

THE FIX?

Regular diaphragmatic breathing exercises. Sounds a bit boring (I know!) but I reassure my clients that their most guaranteed route to exceptional public speaking is through proper breathing technique. Just two minutes of diaphragmatic breathing a day, or ten minutes a couple of times a week trains the body to remain in control under pressure. So even if you get that 'fight-or-fight' feeling before a talk or presentation, your breath will be unaffected and your voice, as a result, will be supported, sound clear and and strong. On session one, I usually teach my clients simple diaphragmatic breathing exercises.

Race car speeding
Race car speeding
  1. RUSHING

Ahhh, I've seen this one many times. The urge to spare yourself (and everyone in the room) the horror of listening to you speak for ten minutes. Frequently my clients say to me 'I just want to get through it!' The problem? Everyone knows that's what your doing. And unfortunately speed does not signal confidence. Rushed speech is usually accompanied by shallow breathing so this one tends to be a 'twofer.'

THE FIX?

Well it's not just 'Slow Down.' For those of you prone to galloping along, it's often so habitual that any kind of slowing down feels as though you are moving at the pace of a glacier. It feels threatening and boring to the speaker. What I often ask clients to do instead, is imagine an activity where they feel completely relaxed and at home. This could be walking the beach, enjoying a pint at the pub with some friends, knitting...anything. When you think about doing that activity, how does the body feel? Relaxed! Calm. No need to rush. Remember the feeling in your body and try delivering a few lines of your speech. You'll be amazed how taking your time now feels easier. And it's not just about the speaking bit. Take your time as you walk to the podium / platform / microphone / address the attendees on the zoom call. Holding the room and having the chutzpah to take your time, is powerful.

Woman making eye contact
Woman making eye contact
  1. AVOIDING EYE CONTACT (OR TOO MUCH EYE CONTACT)

Love it or hate it, eye contact, is an essential part of Public Speaking. A talk where the speaker never makes eye contact can feel lifeless, alienating, and vague. But carefully placed eye contact held for just the right amount of time makes your audience feel connected, and engaged. Eye contact draws us in, it makes us empathise with you, it makes us trust you - especially key when you're pitching or presenting a message with a 'Call to Action.' And don't just take my word for it: it's a fact that eye contact helps release oxytocin, a chemical messenger that enables social connection.

THE FIX?

Start small. 3-5 seconds is the ideal amount of time to make eye contact for when delivering a speech to a group. Any longer can feel a bit too intense! So, if you're someone who struggles, try for 1 second or 0.5 seconds and build your way up. I go by the rule 'New Sentence. New person.' As an absolute last resort you can always try looking at the space between someone's eyes, which from the distance, gives the same effect.  When I'm presenting I actually really enjoy making eye contact. I find rather than stress me out, it calms me down and makes me feel more present. And there's scientific basis for this. Extensive research by Dr Stephen Porges has shown non-threatening eye contact helps to calm the nervous system, lowering adrenaline and steadying your own heart rate. It looks a little like this:

[Speaker makes eye contact]

[Brain perceives social safety]

[Vagus Nerve activates the "Vagal Brake"]

[Heart rate slows & Adrenaline drops]

[Blood returns to the Prefrontal Cortex]

[Speaker feels physiologically calm and thinks clearly]

Clearly a win win!

Bored audience
Bored audience
  1. DELIVERING EVERYTHING IN THE SAME WAY

We've all listened to a talk like this. It starts off interesting and then your mind starts to wander. The monotony of the delivery makes it hard to focus on the individual points the speaker is making. Think of your speech as a piece of music. We respond to rhythm, variety, build, flow. Think how effective moments of pause are in music, how we enjoy verses and choruses, hooks and melodies. When our voice has so much natural variety, delivering a presentation entirely in the same tone and pace, is a missed opportunity.

THE FIX?

Look at the structure of your speech. Identify your introduction, main body and conclusion. You want your introduction to be clear, memorable and to the point. For the main body, it's often helpful to break the speech down into sections and think 'how do I want my audience to feel?' for each. For example if you have a particularly complex section and you decide you want them to feel informed, try slowing down a little on that section and emphasising your key words. If you want them to feel energised, create that feeling in the room by taking up your own energy on that section, be more expansive in your movements, play with volume. If you're delivering a lighter section, play with humour, smiling and gentler delivery. You'll be amazed how much more information your audience retains when you give each section its own identity. And your conclusion? Think about the impact you want to leave the room with. Is there a sense of urgency? Is there a direct call to action? Is it calm and controlled or are you finishing with a personal story? Each of these things has a different quality. Start with the feeling you want to evoke and explore how voice, emphasis, eye contact and pace convey that feeling.

Person falling
Person falling
  1. FAILING TO RECOVER FROM A 'MISTAKE'

I'm sure we've all experienced this at some stage. It's all going so well and then you forget a word, get suddenly nervous, accidentally skip ahead, make a joke that doesn't land, notice someone looking bored. etc. etc. etc. All of these things are human and to be expected, even from seasoned professional speakers. What matters most is your recovery. It's very easy to get in your head when something doesn't go to plan. Many speakers panic, withdraw or push to too hard to regain the audience, taking an otherwise great speech into the category of one that didn't go so well.

THE FIX?

Breathe.

When something goes wrong, breathe.

Always.

It will calm you down.

Now, give yourself time to recover. Rushing ahead while you're panicking signals your mistake more than taking a moment to regain full control does. The chances are your audience might not have even noticed your error. If you watch the most brilliant comedians/motivational speakers/actors/spokespeople, etc., most of them fluff a word every so often, but because they carry on so confidently, these mistakes barely register. And if it's so big that everyone definitely noticed eg. you've fallen flat on your face (!) Acknowledge it, make a joke (if you feel brave enough), realise that this will only make your audience empathise with you, and MOVE ON!


And if this is a fix you'd like to tackle in more depth, I have specific techniques for helping with carrying on, that can be tailored to each client.


I'm a Public Speaking Coach based in Brighton & Hove and working internationally online. If you'd like to schedule a fifteen free minute discovery call with me, to see how I can help with your public speaking goals, you can do so here

 
 
 

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